Cost-Effective Feminine Necessities that Work in a SHTF World

My Fellow American Women

We have needs. Particular needs of a physiological nature that - no matter how many femi-nazis will say “we're all equal” - make us DIFFERENT from the rest of humanity (men), the most obvious of which happens in the restroom. How do we address those needs in a cost-effective, sustainable manner that will also be viable in a SHTF scenario? *cough*Sandy*cough, cough*

Let's start with toilet paper. Apparently we need it more than guys do, but toilet paper is a finite resource that will rapidly become scarce and worth more than gold. How do we conserve toilet paper, then?

Solution: wet rags.

This is the part where you go, “Hawkweed, wtf are you talking about? What's a 'wet rag' and why the hell would I want to use that?” Well, I'll tell you.

Assuming that you didn't just go number 2, in which case the need for toilet paper is non-negotiable, a wet rag is a regular wash rag, designated solely for the use of cleaning yourself up when you use the loo.

1. Take the rag, wet it and rinse it at the bathroom sink
2. Go do your business
3. Clean up with the wet rag
4. Take the rag back with you to the sink and rinse it thoroughly before hanging it up it the spot you have for it
5. Wash your hands and carry on with your day

If the power is out and the water is not running, a pre-collected bowl of rinse water will do, provided you're able to change it every several uses or so.

Now this is the part where I tell you the other benefits aside from saving toilet paper that all this has.

One benefit is that no “little white fuzzies” will be left behind by the wet rag. Another is that you will actually be left cleaner and fresher with the water from the wet rag than you would if you used the dry paper - like taking a shower (albeit without soap) versus trying to take a shower without even turning on the water or getting wet.

This is also a great solution for staying clean when you're on your period, and makes a huge cut down on mess.

Speaking of when you're on your period, ever consider a set of cloth menstrual pads? Cotton seems a lot more comfortable and less odorous than recycled paper and plastic, don'tchya think?

Consider this as a good starting place for shopping cloth pads: http://www.naturallycozy.com/naturally-cozy.html

Stocked with a good set, it should last you your whole period, be easily taken care of with a rinse and then a run through the laundry, and then put away until next month, all very cost-effective.

Your toilet paper and money are all saved for other important uses, while your highly important feminine needs are addressed in a sustainable way.

Unless you're a tampons kind of gal, in which case you are braver than me, but at the same time I do not envy you one bit.

“Go Green” and “Life is Hard”

Disclaimer: This is not to the III%, who are worth their salt.

I hate these two phrases more than anything else uttered on the face of the Earth in any language, and no, it's not even for the usual righteously indignant, “can't stand the fluffy-bunnies” reasons, either.

I hate them because every time I hear them or read them, the person saying or writing them never – and I do mean invariably NEVER – has any real idea of what they're even talking about.

I would know.

Let's start with the latter phrase, “life is hard,” shall we?

This is almost always spoken by somebody on food stamps, or some other public assistance, and/or spends roughly $400 a month or more on their groceries, at least. They also still have enough money for gas, buying a few DVDs here and there, or some music off iTunes, new shoes, new clothes, and can go out every so often with friends, maybe even somewhere out of town for vacation. They indulge in things like chocolate, and cream and sugar with their coffee.

My monthly stipend for food is $40 a month. It has been for the past handful of years now, and it's not going to change. My husband, the family cook, plans out meals for the whole month, so that we don't run out. $40 is a good as it gets.

No movies, no music, no new books, no new swag. No new anything that we don't absolutely need.

“Life is hard,” is NOTHING that I want to hear from some other woman in a cute top, blinking at me with mascara on her lashes, with her over-fed brood in nikes and winter coats, stuffing their shopping carts with cheese and chips and cereal, going home in their gassed-up mini-van, to their air-conditioned/centrally heated home where they will watch TV, gripe over something someone said on facebook, and go to bed snug as a bug (and that's only ONE example of the variety of folks with no idea).

DO NOT EVER TELL ME YOUR LIFE IS HARD.

I KNOW what hard life is.

I live and thrive on $40 a month. Chances are, you can't do what I do. If you would like to, I'll see you in Idaho. Otherwise, stop seeking sympathy or pity, I have none to spare in this arena, and it should be very evident as to why.

… And I hate having to pull out the “hard-life” ruler, it's tacky and time-consuming, really. It never makes me feel any better, either.

Next phrase, “Go Green.” The social engineering slogan that is all talk, no walk, targets the WRONG people for environmental culpability, and is at best a flat out joke.

Do people actually think that the true culprits of pollution, the big mega-corporations, are going to be swayed from their profiteering practices by a few bleeding hearts in green t-shirts? If so, please keep them far away from me.

The Greenwashed masses always talk about getting back to nature, saving energy, helping the Earth... but what do they actually DO about it, really?

Getting back to nature typically doesn't happen. People are scared to death of Nature. You mention foraging or hunting and fishing to these folks and you're looked at as though you're some kind of backwards savage. Why do all that stuff, when you can just go buy organic from big natural food brands at big natural foods' stores that are actually owned by even bigger companies that push the artificial-crap-posing-as-food brands that they own right alongside their “good stuff”? Heaven forbid, you might get dirty! Or miss American Idol! Cooking from scratch takes too much time! And skinning and gutting is ICKYYYYYYY!

They continue to drink fluoridated water and put aspartame in their drinks, too, it's so quaint.

Really, though, foraging and hunting = it DOESN'T GET any more “organic” and “all-natural” than this!

But no, it is as I quote from one of my neighbors as he said of some plants in our yard, “Why would you want save them? Those are weeds!” So genuinely flabbergasted was he, that we would spare a bunch of unsightly weeds (the awful horror). My husband then educated him on the fact that it was burdock. Burdock root is also known as “gobo.”

As I recall, he didn't have much to say beyond a few grumbles about that. But back he went to his perfectly manicured, big empty lawn, with it's few ornamentals here and there and not a single “weed” in sight, edible or otherwise. It continues to remain to this day the very envy of golf-course-esque backyard lawns everywhere.

Recycling is good. But those fluorescent bulbs that are supposedly so great are actually manufactured with mercury, and are highly toxic to the earth, not to mention the spectrum they emit has been proven for years now to weaken people who are directly exposed to it for prolonged periods of time, making them lethargic and unfocused. Makes you wonder why they make it mandatory and “code” to have it schools and office buildings, doesn't it? Not only that, if one breaks, it literally requires a haz-mat team to clean up, I exaggerate not, look it up.

Natural light from a window by day, incandescent fixture by night for me, please and thank you, until we can find something that actually IS better.

Ever notice that the go-greeners often tend to spend a lot, as well? Buying expensive organic food, expensive imported “natural fiber” clothes, expensive “hybrid” vehicles, expensive “natural” personal hygiene products (which may or may not actually be as the label-marketing touts), mineral makeup, and on and on.

But here's me, with my all-natural food that I got first-hand with my husband, no processing beyond water and a knife-blade. My face bears no makeup, doesn't need it, except maybe a little lip color for out in public. I sit basking in the view of the autumn sky, bright even with illuminated cloud cover, and I'm in comfortable clothes that I've managed to make last for nearly five years. No money spent, there, no resources wasted, and no pollution.

I don't need to “go green.” I already live as green as it gets, without even trying. So all the folks wailing with their anti-humanity pro-cuddly-animals-and-flowers crap can go re-evaluate themselves and the way that THEY choose to live, thank you.